Why a lot of people try to change them-self after a breakup or a heartbreak?Perhaps, if they would have tried this in a relationship, they would have still been together…
So,the above statement is infinitely broad and can be taken as extremely insensitive, but hear me out. Of course I understand that an unsatisfying event in life is required which result in new perspective and self-reflection.
So, I am not asking you why people try new things after separation.It’s not even the point that we should always blame our-self for the separation.This statement is all about comfort. My vision in this situation is directly related to the concept of comfortness. Being comfortable with oneself and one’s expectation.
So, after a rejection or a separation how many of us have said something like this, I am gonna be new me-means almost upgrade myself to the best. Example- I’m gonna read more!,gonna start cooking!,gonna learn dancing!, gonna join gym!,do all the awesome things I have missed due to relationship, explore my self which i couldn’t have done just!!because of relationship. We just delay all this stuffs by saying, ooh! it’s too expensive, ooh! it’s full of trouble, ooh! it’s too lame. And it’s not just with ‘activity’ but also with our ‘behaviour’
Back to the point, when people looses bf/gf they literally just try to change every thing like physical appearance,hair cut,attitude,behaviour,acts…
So the question must be asked… If all this transmutes push us then why are we taking this transmutes in a negative way.
It still depends on you that how will you face your breakup. You can get depressed and loose self-confidence and be isolated or get motivated upgrade your-self and come out with a better you.